Hamlet and Lear are homosexual

If my favourite poet of the twentieth century, William Butler Yeats, had had his poem "Lapis Lazuli" run through the fundamentalist American Family Association’s OneNewsNow site:

I have heard that hysterical women say
They are sick of the palette and fiddle-bow.
Of poets that are always homosexual,
For everybody knows or else should know
That if nothing drastic is done
Aeroplane and Zeppelin will come out,
Pitch like King Billy bomb-balls in
Until the town lie beaten flat.

All perform their tragic play,
There struts Hamlet, there is Lear,
That's Ophelia, that Cordelia;
Yet they, should the last scene be there,
The great stage curtain about to drop,
If worthy their prominent part in the play,
Do not break up their lines to weep.
They know that Hamlet and Lear are homosexual;

--

All things fall and are built again,
And those that build them again are homosexual.

A big h/t to Red Tory for this, although he owes me a new keyboard.

UPDATE: Slap Upside The Head imagines Christmas with the AFA.